so you can keep me 

inside the pocket of your ripped jeans

holding me closer till our eyes meet

you wont ever be alone

and if you hurt me

that's okay baby only words bleed

inside these pages you just hold me

and i wont ever let you go

you can fit me

inside the necklace you got when you're 16

next to your heartbeat where I should be

keep it deep within your soul

WKWKWK

HAE GAES

gila ya post gua bawah bawah berat banget kaya semacem over depressed gitu. 

iya sih emg lagi sedih, but I'm not in the mood to kill myself over few silly things that succeed turn over my happiness into calamity. 

keliatannya kaya mau bundir gitu kata-katanya.

nope. im still feeling as good to continue being a potato.

kalo ada yang penasaran gimana college life 

ya bisa dibilang happy" aja, temennya baik" and not going to tell lies, seru", walopun gua merasa banyak dari mereka yang wearing mask. everyday. every hour every minute and every second. lama-lama gua jadi lebih ngerti dunia industri sedikit-sedikit, tentang pressure nya dan gua sedikit banyak udah dapet banyak gambaran.

anyway, gua tambah gendut. ya. kerjaan gua selain pergi makan, ato numpang tidur di kosan temen, bikin berat gua tambah. lebih begonya lagi, gua malah jadi suka gadoin butter kalo pas kelas kicthen ato pastry. 

oiya,  walopun gua merasa agak sedikit ga nyaman sama beberapa hal, misalnya kelompok table masak dll, tapi gua lebih bisa endure walau kadang kelepasan gua bete trus keliatan di muka gitu, ( im not an expert in hiding emotions ) tapi kebanyakan dari mereka care, dan gua bersyukur untuk itu, really. I'm Blessed.

setidaknya ada 4-5 orang yang bener-bener gua cherished so much. feels like we've known like forever,

gua juga jadi salah satu anggota organisasi ukm di kuliahan, yang berhubungan dengan bartending, dan ya...its going better than the first time I'm in. some thing changes of course, tapi mungkin thats the price.

belom lama ini gua juga ikut english debate competition, sebagai peserta dari kampus di kampus mercu buana, ngelawan kampus-kampus lingkungan kopertis 3 such as binus inter,atma,untar,UI dll.exciting sih tapi ya bener-bener bikin worry, pertama kalinya gua harus debate diliatin orang-orang gitu and its a strange feeling you got there. nervous sama lebih ga percaya diri. karena kebanyakan pesertanya juga uda lebih pengalaman. anyway ga jelek' banget lah hasilnya as a beginner we got 12th place dari 48 university. I'm glad.

hmm sebenernya banyak yang mau gua ceritain dan ga akan abis satu post kalo gua ceritain satu-satu. my precious memory and experiences that i got so far. tapi kayaknya untuk hari ini cukup ini aja. lain waktu I'm definitely going to post another story

I'm more than you think

Her wings Once So White.

She was once so light.

She made the sky shine.

She met a strange guy and fell in love.

He made her believe lies to steal her light.

Now she sits alone in the dark.

Tears fill her eyes.

She sits alone crying as sorrow consumes her.

Her wings now dark.

She is now so grey.

She no longer has her light.

The sky around her is slowly falling.

For now she is a Fallen Angel.... That weeps of a broken heart

They call me fallen,
My wings are all I have left of me now.

wings torn for making a forbidden choice,

but truly, they are-

ethereal wisps

fading like the morning fog.

Bitter laughter stains my lips-

human life is so much better

because they take comfort in the

fleeting illusions of rights and wrongs

and judging the sides of the coin

My halo,now bent

Is lieing on the heavenly ground.

My heavenly dress,

Is covered in blood.

my eyes  are as dark as night.

As i begin to frown,

I cant help,but wonder

how my peaceful life,

was turned upside down.

I'm more fragile than you think

I'm more unstable than you think

I've lived a heavy life more than you think

I'm broken, more severe than you think I am.

I Loved Him

I loved how his eyes danced merrily,

and the gentle way he spoke;

the way he filled my aimless days,

with bitterness and hope.

I loved him as I fell to sleep, 

and each morning I woke;

I loved him with all my wayward heart-

until the day it broke.

Letting Go

There is a particular kind of suffering to be experienced when you love something greater than yourself.
A tender sacrifice.

Like that pained silence felt in the lost song of a mermaid; or the bent and broken feet of a dancing ballerina.
It is in every considered step I am taking in the opposite direction of you. 

A Time Capsule

This is where

                                                                                  I began to care                                                                                                                                         When I was befriended;                                           

This is where
                            My soul was bared
                                                  Where are my rules were bended;

This is where
                              A moment we shared
                                    Was stolen and expended;

Now this is where
              This is where
                                   This is where we've ended




                                                    - Lang Leav

High Hopes

Hopes gua tahun ini sebenernya banyak, banget, dibanding tahun lalu
tapi ya namanya orang, ga boleh terlalu punya high expectations,
walopun sbnernya dalem hati ada sih sedikit banyak macemmacem expect ini itu

pas lagi nulis ini gua sambil dengerin lagu - all i need is your love nya DEORRO. ga ngerti lagi, hacep banget

well, kali ini gua lagi dalam state yang setengah harap-harap tapi ga mau punya banyak ekspetasi karena dari pengalaman yang gua punya, kebanyakan sih mengecewakan.

harapan gua ke satu orang ini, semoga tahun ini ga cuma legenda aja, karena ya, seengganya kalo harapan gua yang lain ga terjadi, cuma satu iiniiii aja, gua berharap banget.
istilahnya ya, " Please God, just this once"
yep.

dan gua juga berharap tahun 2015 bisa berjalan smooth, semua hal yang gua handle sekarang gua berharap juga bisa jalan sesuari rencana, ya ga muluk2 deh, asal berakhir bagus aja, at least bisa diterima orang-orang.

semoga bisa lebih baik. Amin.

Akhirnya kuliah

Diitung dari pertama kali gua punya blog, hmmm kira2 uda brp taun umur ini blog diitung dari smp kls 1? , bukannya gua lupa, cuma ga jago ngitung aja.

Di 2015, momen gua mau masuk di semester 2 perkuliahan, akhirnya gua sadar, gua sama mat emang ga boleh ketemu. Ngelantur. 

Well, apa kabar gays ? :') fyi, gua skrg kuliah di Trisakti, hospitality management major, di bintaro, saat ini lagi berusaha fokus memperdalam ilmu bartender. 

Temen2 gua ? Berpencar semua.

Apalagi temen smp, batang idung aja gua uda ga pernah liat. Ya, time flies so fast. 

Di Trisakti gua banyak ketemu senior baru yang yaaa asik, bukan klise kok ini serius, temen2nya juga ga se-judes yang gua kira gua bakal susah nyari temen baru. 

Emang belom sedeket temen smp sma sih, tapi mereka asik. 

Gua banyak belajar, kalo temen pasti nambah, selama kita ga lupa sama yang lama aja.

Gua kangen temen lama, tapi ya life must go on, bukan berarti dengan gua kangen temen lama, gua clinging terus ke mereka, karena pasti mereka juga punya kesibukan sendiri, punya kehidupan kepentingan sendiri sekarang. Everything has changed. 

Gua berharap kita semua bisa sukses aja. 

Klise, tapi semoga mereka ga lupa gua hahaha 

Goodluck juga buat yang disana! ;')